Table for One?

Published by Jasmine Langcaster-James on February 4, 2019February 4, 2019

What better way to celebrate who we are than by taking ourselves out on a date?

In a world where we spend hours a day comparing ourselves to other people through the tiny screens we keep in our back pockets, it’s easy to forget, under appreciate or even dislike the person you are. By being taught to constantly think of the future and plot what we can do to ‘better’ ourselves, we lose sight of how important it is to value who we are right now. We need to remember, in true Bridget Jones and Mr Darcy fashion: you are enough just the way you are. And what better way to celebrate who we are than by taking ourselves out on a date?

 I’ve only made two New Years Resolutions this year. One is to write more letters, which I’ll go into in a future blog post, the other is to show myself some TLC by taking myself out on dates. I have promised myself that 2019 is the year of leaving behind missed movies at the cinema because no one else fancied it, leaving behind that fear of being judged for sitting alone eating in a restaurant, and definitely leaving behind only going to coffee shops when it was to catch up with a friend. In fact, I am writing this blog post from my table-for-one in a gorgeous independent bakery café I’ve always wanted to check out but never did because friends preferred meeting at Starbucks. It feels great. I’m sitting with a cappuccino and a brioche bun, phone tucked away out of sight, enjoying some ‘me’ time. 

So here is your friendly reminder to celebrate yourself and take yourself out on a date. It may feel silly at first but some of my favourite memories are my very few and far between self-dates: An afternoon of wandering round art galleries when I was 18 followed by lunch in a nearby café reading a new book – it was the moment I realised I loved being a self-sufficient adult who only had myself to thank for those wonderful few hours and that cheese Panini. I once took myself out for dinner in New York, sat outside with my salad and wine and eventually got talking to the lovely old gentleman who was sitting alone on the table next to me about how he’d always wanted to go to Paris. I still look fondly at the table in the window of an Italian I took myself to after my first completed semester at University, where I sat with my pizza and people-watched those around me celebrate their birthdays, catch up with friends, and fall in love. I treasure these memories, so I don’t know why it has taken me until 2019 to realise that these moments don’t only need to happen once a year, but should happen as often as possible. 

It’s so important to love yourself, as all good clichéd Tumblr quotes preach, and although it’s a journey that for some of us will take a lot more than the occasional afternoon in a coffee shop, it’s still a good start. I’m already planning my next date: a cinema trip to see ‘Colette’, which looks like a fabulous movie and I can’t wait! 

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this, and if you have any ways you show yourself some TLC, so comment below!